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Why yes, Fat is STILL a Feminist Issue!!

Wednesday 6th May, 2009 in fat acceptance, feminism by Suzi | No comments

So, I’ve just complete a month long stint of guest blogging over on The F Word. I didn’t get to post much- once a week or so, simply .because of my huge time commitments to work, study and family. However, while I was there I wrote a piece I had been meaning to write for a while about Thin Privilege.

Whilst the start of my post is straight up wrong- a valuable lesson for me to learn-, when talking about privilege and oppression, I stand by the points I make about how being fat puts one at a disadvanatge in this world, and how thin people, do have privilege over fat people.

I got an email today from a friend asking me if I had read this piece by Amanata about fat hatred. So I went and read it……… and then had to fight the urge to applaud, loudly, because she says everything I try and say, but does it a million times better.

I recommend you read the piece I wrote at The F Word, and please accept my immediate apologies for the first paragraph or so- I made a mistake, and in doing so said something highly offensive. Bloggers, are humans too.

I also recommend you read this piece written by Anji, from Shut Up, Sit Down, and then read Amanata’s piece. And if you don’t find yourself agreeing, or find yourself thinking  ‘but being thin is hard too….’ then Shut Up, Sit Down, and Learn Something.

Being fat is not easier than being thin. Being thin is a socially acceptable, and desirable thing to be. Being fat is seen as deviant, unattractive, sexually inadequate, and a characteristic of someone who lacks in self control. Being fat means people will criticise your day to day life- if you eat they will tell you it is the wrong thing, if you don’t they will praise you for ‘being good’ (becuase of course being fat, you will also be infantilised. A lot). You will find it difficult to buy clothes that fit- and I don’t mean, difficult to find clothes that fit in a flattering way, I mean find it difficult to buy clothes at all. People will publicly humiliate you, and everywhere you look you will be told you are unnaceptable, unlovable, sub human. You will have to listen to people tell you all about how much of a health risk you are, and how much of a drain you are on NHS resources- despite the fact that smoking causes more disease and costs more of tax payers money a year than obesity, and despite the fact that links between obesity and the things it supposedly causes (like Type 2 diabetes for example) are tenuous at best.

And if you try and complain that you are being discriminated against and oppressed because of your shape/size people will promptly tell you, you are wrong and you don’t know how hard it is to be thin.

Actually, I do know how hard it is to be thin. I have had an active eating disorder for 10 years. I’ve been in a state of recovery for about 18 months. Not living in a state of starvation, and a cycle of purging, alongside several injuries and existing medical conditions means I have put on about 6 stone. I have gone from a dress size 8 to a dress size 18. And at no point in any of that time, have I experienced anything, which has made me glad that I am bigger. At no point has anyone made a single comment that has made me glad that I no longer have a socially acceptable body. And ironically- now I no longer starve myself, and purge, and smoke to try and keep my body weight down, I am significantly healthier than I was when I was thin. I have struggled, and continue to struggle to accept my body as it is, and to accept that fat or no I am still a vibrant, intelligent worthy, sexually attractive human being.

Don’t tell me that Thin Privilege doesn’t exist. If you are thin, you will have the privilege of not being discriminated against and abused daily, based on the completely arbitrary factor of your weight/ body shape. If you are thin, your food choices are less likely to be interrogated, you are more likely to be employed and less likely to be informed by doctors that every medical condition you have, regardless of whether you had it before you gained weight or not, is caused by weight. And you will have to listen to completely ableist crap that equates health with thin-ness and the ability to perform lots of excercise.

Fat is still a feminist issue. It’s even more of a feminist issue now that society has become obsessed with the ‘obesity epidemic’. And it is about time that fat acceptance got to be a part of mainstream feminist discourse, and thin privilege got recognised alongside other privileges.

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A weighty issue.

Sunday 5th October, 2008 in feminism, gender by Suzi | No comments

So yesterday I wrote about how much hassle a simple shopping trip to buy new office clothes was. Today is where I write about why my shopping trip can be analysed in a feminist way.

For starters there’s the fact that women like it or not are judged by wider society according to their body shape. In our current climate Fat = BAD and Thin= GOOD. In fact it isn’t just thin but skeletal. We don’t praise people’s natural beauty or their talents, personality of intelligence, we judge them according to their bodies. And this judgement is particularly harsh when it comes to clothes and fashion. This judgement means that eating disorders are on the rise and in a world where people are dying of starvation and poverty, in the richer west women are encouraged to starve themselves, to not eat to avoid the ‘temptations’ of the privilege of food. Before we get into this if you haven’t read Kate Hardings post on Shapely Prose, ‘Don’t You Realize Fat is Unhealthy?’ go read it. It’s ok, I’ll wait. Also add Shapely Prose to your blog feed.

Ok. In yesterdays post I talked about the fact that I’m fat. Not in a negative way but as a statement of fact. I am larger than average, I have big boobs, big hips, big thighs, and a big tummy. What I didn’t mention (thought the bulimia may have given the game away) is just how unbelievably suicidally(and I’m not using that word lightly) awful being fat makes me feel. I quite literally hate myself. So clothes shopping is a fricking nightmare.

Renee at Womanist Musings has talked many times about acceptable bodies in Society (I’m really sorry Renee I couldn’t find the specific link I meant!!) from a racial point of view, and I think she’s absolutely spot on. The same thing applies when it comes to fat- the only acceptable bodies in our society are the thin ones. Fat women have no place. Fat men have less of a place, but fat women are written out or are objects of derision. When women like Beth Ditto get naked on the cover of NME, to make a point about how fat women are treated, whilst there was a lot of positive (and mostly feminist) response, there was also an awful lot of ‘ewww look at the fat minger ewww and she didn’t even shave her pits’ shite going on too. I won’t link to any of it, because well quite frankly it’s hate speech and I’ll have no part of that ta.

The ‘Obesity Epidemic’ is part of the same fat hatred problem- levels of obesity as far as I have read are actually no higher than 30 years ago (check out Junkfood Science for some myth debunking). The problem is society keeps moving the goalposts on what is considered obese. The fact that it is incredibly difficult to purchase clothes over a size 16 on the high street merely hammers home the simple fact that in this society, fat women are considered a dangerous threat. After all, we all know having fat friends will make you fat and we wouldn’t want any of you to die now would we?

It’s hard in the face of so much fat hatred, it’s hard to remember that size is a number, weight is an arbitrary figure and realistically speaking none of it actually matters that much, providing your healthy. I wish I had a solution to this shit- and I have a bit of one. Don’t support shops and businesses that don’t stock a decent range of sizes, don’t spend your hard earned money supporting businesses that promote fat hatred and self hatred and that don’t bother to cut clothes differently according to size. Don’t buy from companies that mock fat people in their adverts and do support shops like Monsoon who do nice clothes, cut for bigger people and support companies like Lush who make gorgeous natural preservative free cosmetics.

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On a personal note….

Sunday 5th October, 2008 in feminism, gender, Uncategorized by Suzi | 1 comment

I don’t normally write personal blogposts here on FemAcadem – those tend to go over on my LiveJournal where only my nearest and dearest can see them. This personal post though has elements that could be taken as feminist, although for now I’ll post the explanation and then tomorrow I’ll write an analysis of the feminist elements.

I recently got a new job, working for an organisation that works with the criminal justice system to provide help for people with drug and alcohol problems. Although my post is new, and will mean I have to essentially develop my own service, which will be hard work to achieve what with Uni and all, I’m massively excited about it.

This new job, however, meant I had to go clothes shopping- I have nothing in my wardrobe suitable for wearing in a professional situation. I spend my life in mens t-shirts, the one pair of jeans I own that fit and sports bras for comfort. Fine when running around after my kids, or going to lectures but definately not appropriate for a formal work environment.

I hate clothes shopping. I actually loathe it. I’m a fat girl- my weight tops 90kg, and I don’t even want to think about my BMI. There are a number of reasons why I’m big- 10 years of bulimia and on/off calorie restricting (I spent 2004-late 2007on 500 calories a day, with regular periods of fasting for 3-4 days at a stretch), along with having spent from age 5-14 on a calorie controlled diet means my metabolism is more than a little fucked. Add in the fact I quit smoking in December 07 and  the afore mentioned years of dietary abuse which means my hunger responses are all out of wack and you have a girl who started uni last September a (UK) size 8 and finished in July a (UK) size 18. Pretty much the only thing that hasn’t changed in all that time is my bra size- 36H. For those of you not in the know about bra sizes, that comes under the category OUCH!

I have huge problems finding clothes. When I was skinny, it was just tops that were my problem- they never went over my boobs. Now I have trouble finding tops, and trousers – most clothes manufacturers don’t bother to alter the cut of clothing for larger sizes, they just scale up the measurments and voila- all clothes in all sizes. Problem is- that doesn’t tend to look too good. I have a whole rant there about how the fashion industry discriminates against fat people, but right now I’m trying to be positive. Kinda.

So I go shopping today, dragging Lovely Admin with me for moral support and opinions. I garuntee I can dress anyone you stick in front of me in lovely clothes that will look gorgeous, and that they will feel comfortable in, but I cannot for the life of me dress myself. I try stuff on and it looks gross and I’m inexperienced with the whole ‘feminine’ clothing thing. Mostly I’ve always just worn jeans and t’s or stuff other people have told me to buy.

Oxford has a fairly decent town centre. My first stop is Bravvissimo, for bras that actually fit. No good buying nice office clothes if your underclothes are all wrong, as a good friend and teacher pointed out to me on Thursday. No problems there- 3 shiny new bras in the required size all checked for a good fit by Jen, the lovely fitter. Never underestimate the power of good fitting bra- I encourage all ladies bigger than a D cup to find their local Bravissimo and get a proper fitting- you will be amazed at the difference.

So then we head to my favourite shoe shop- I say favourite- it stocks the knee high stripey sock I am so very fond of.Seeing as most of mine had holes and I’m down to four pairs, I brought some new ones. I also tried to find some decent comfy boots- but this place doesn’t carry an extended range of leg sizes in boots, and I can’t get anything higher than base of my calf muscle. I used to be a long distance runner, which has left me with some big muscles in my legs. A big fashion no no it would seem. If rule number one of easy shopping is have no breasts, rule number two is definitely have no leg muscles.

After that we start the slog round the clothes shops. I had a wardrobe planned in my head- 2-3 pairs of smart jeans/trousers, some vest tops, few nice cardigans, few shirts and a some v necked jumpers. There you have a nice wardrobe of practical but comfy clothes that are smart enough for work but casual enough for uni. The High Street however, had other ideas.

Nothing fit- not in Next, or Dorothy Perkins, both normally ok-ish for bigger sizes. And as for Marks and Spencer who used to be amazingly damn good for bigger sized jeans- do not shop there if you’re bigger than a ten. I couldn’t even get the size 18 trousers over my thighs. And I tried 6 different pairs , in different styles.

Weight is a big thing, if you’ll pardon the pun. Not because it actually matters, but because of how society, especially in these’obesity’ obsessed days views it. Not being able to find nice clothes that not only fit, but fit well and look good is soul destroying. It’s another way of telling fat people they don’t deserve to have any kind of niceness or status. Not only are you so fat you’re destroying society , you’re so fat there’s no way anyone can make nice clothes for you. Shame on you. How dare you be taking up the space inhabited by those deserving thin people who put in the work it takes to be acceptable.

After M&S I just stood in the street and cried on Lovely Admin. Nothing for me brings on a bout of evil self hatred quite as much as trying to find clothes that fit. Clothes shopping is something I do because I have to. I don’t tend to shop to look nice- I do it to look as inoffensive as possible. There was one last place on my list of shops- Monsoon.

Monsoon is a very nice clothes shop. It’s damned expensive -£40 for a cardigan,£20 for a vest top kind of expensive, but it is worth it. I normally end up their as my last resort when I’ve tried everywhere else and I’m searching for a dress. Today it was my last resort for an entire wardrobe, and the end result is I am now refusing to shop anywhere for clothes that isn’t there. The clothes are really nice, and comfy and the sizes are generous- I can feasibly fit between a 16 and 20 depending on the item. And the people are nice. No sneering shop girls who look at you in horror when you ask for a larger size, no being unable to find what you want in your size. They don’t at the moment stock upwards of size 22- but they do have a decent range of goods in those sizes, unlike M&S, who claim to stock to a 24, and then have very little above a size 16.

I ended up spending 2 hours in there trying stuff on, with Hannah, a very nice assistant, who ran round and got stuff for me, and made suggestions and encouraged me to try thing in colours I wouldn’t normally even consider. Which pretty much means she got me into stuff that wasn’t black. I actually enjoyed the experience and I walked out their with two bags of really nice clothes, that I can mix and match and wear for work or uni or going to Magic tourneys or playing with the kids. It was really nice to be somewhere, where there was no judgement on me for being bigger, and where the clothes are well cut, and fit amazingly nicely.

So- if you are in the UK, and you, like me, have trouble with clothes shopping I recommend Monsoon. Go there, and enjoy the experience of wearing clothes. Tomorrow I’m going to write about the way we as a society look at weight and size and clothing and how women are marginalised and discriminated against becuse of those things. But that’s my feel good story of the day.

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